Wokeness is the new fruit of the Spirit, according to a Galatians update

An update from the Babylon Bee, which always makes me laugh!

PORTLAND, OR—A coalition of progressive Bible scholars convened in Portland this week and agreed to add a new fruit of the Spirit to the biblical list in Galatians 5: “wokeness.”

According to the resolution, being “woke” is an essential part of being a Christian, and anyone who’s not on board with the social agenda and policies of the Left is not exhibiting the proper fruit of the Spirit in their lives.

It ends thus:

“Be on your guard, for fellow left-leaning social justice advocates prowl about like a roaring lion, looking for someone to call out for not being woke enough,” Patterson cautioned. “If you make one wrong move, we will eat you alive.”

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I'm always grateful that my readers are the kind who don't need to be reminded of what satire means. [Use "satire" in a sentence. Response: "I'm satire." (Trans. Pagod ako.)]